Christopher slipped back to his room just before dark. He’d kept his room locked forbidding even the maids under the pretence of ‘presents’.
Re-locking the door he headed the bed, his heart pounding. He was not generally a man prone to guilt, certainly when it concerned women. Yet this time was different and it weighed upon him.
Peering under the bed he froze, Arabella and all clothes where gone.
“I’m here” a voice called, spinning he found the young woman coming out of the closet room drying her face on a towel.
“You washed?” he asked, suddenly feeling foolish.
“Yes” she nodded, “You seem surprised, did you think we wouldn’t?”
“I don’t know” he admitted, the truth be told their existence seemed so alien he found it difficult to imagine them doing anything ordinary and mundane.
“We aren’t as different as you’d imagine”
“Different enough” he decided.
“Perhaps” she agreed “I’m sorry about last night. I didn’t expect to stay, thank you for keeping me safe”
He nodded and there was a strange uncomfortable silence as neither of them seemed sure what to say next. “It can’t happen again” he added finally, “twice is too often already.”
He realised then he was trying to convince himself as much as her. He realised then that last night had not been trickery on her part.
He may not have been in his right mind. Frustrated and confused by his wife perhaps but there had been no manipulation. He’d allowed himself to be with her willingly rightly or wrongly.
She shrugged “Can’t?” she mused, “and yet I feel it will”
“It can’t, I love my wife”
“Can’t you love her and enjoy me?”
He sighed “If only it where that easy?”
“No” he decided, “It would hurt her greatly”
“So tell me, exactly how intimate are you with the child?” she asked. “Have you taken her yet? Educated her what it is to be a woman?”
“We’ve… yes.. yes we have”
“And how was it, did she satisfy your needs?”
“I’m not talking to you about this” he growled, suddenly finding her across the room her body pushed up against his.
“Is that a no?” she purred.
“It was nice.. it is nice… she’s young, learning. My god, I don’t expect her to be an expert” he reasoned.
“Is she a good student?” the young kindred asked, seeming genuinely interested.
“Yes perhaps” he agreed.
“A good little Christian girl” she giggled, stroking his face.
“Your finding her a disappointment” Arabella decided, “it’s not surprising, its often the case”
“Often what case?”
“Silly boy” she scolded, “It’s simple, she’s never been taught she’s supposed to enjoy it”
“Don’t you think I’ve been trying to explain that?” he growled, little appreciating the advice. Especially at a time when he was struggling to keep his body in check, as the young woman undid the ties of his pants.
He batted her hand away, “Now is not the time” he explained feebly.
“Now is the perfect time” the young woman insisted not taking no for an answer and slipping her hand inside his trousers. “You see the thing you have to understand is that, young women particularly young noblewomen are taught from an early age that our desire is wrong, dirty and highly immoral”
He nodded, understanding little beyond his own current desire. Which by now had taken control of his body, refusing to allow him to resist her further advances.
“In most cases” she continued to explain, while her hand busied itself “a young woman’s own curiosity’s develops and despite her teaching, eventually she’ll explore this forbidden domain. Either alone or with company and she’ll find despite herself there is a great deal of pleasure to be had” she grinned, seeming to take great pleasure in his current conflict.
He wanted her to stop.. he needed her to stop she was talking about his wife about their sex life for heaven’s sake and this whole conversation… No this whole situation was highly inappropriate, but god forgive him he was enjoying It.
Suddenly finding himself pushed against the wall she kissed him. The sort of kiss he’d given his soul to receive from his wife. Heated and passionate, she wanted it, she wanted him and damn it she wasn’t scared to show it.
He tottered briefly unbalanced as the young woman dropped quite willingly to her knee’s before him, engaging her mouth elsewhere.
“Damit Arabella” he growled, as he suddenly realised she was now using the opportunity to feed but finding himself unable and unwilling to prevent it.
It was brief but thrilling and when she finally stood there was a distinct look of satisfaction on her face. “You see Christopher, the thing you noblemen fail to realise is that by marrying girls so young is that you break them”
“What do you mean by that?” he asked trying to compose himself while he did up his pants.
“I mean… you take the curiosity away before it develops. She’s not old enough to feel lust or desire and already you’ve killed it for her… you’ve taken the mystery out of it”
“I don’t understand” he grumbled suddenly feeling guilty.
“I mean you’ve turned it into a chore” she replied smugly “To enjoy it, you have to want it, need it … She was a baby. She didn’t understand it enough to want it. You repeatedly give her something she doesn’t understand and wonder why she isn’t grateful”
“She.. I thought…”
“You didn’t think” she interrupted, “You’re a typical man. Part of growing up is exploring one’s own desires, most people man or woman realise they have them BEFORE they actually engage in certain acts. When they do engage for the first time it’s because they want it and because they want it they enjoy it… and it adds fuel to the fire and makes them want it more as they realise just how thrilling it can be ”
“She seemed ready” he argued.
“Ready?!” the young woman laughed, “She’d only just realised she was interested in boy’s. A few weeks of her experimenting with kissing and cuddling and naturally you assumed that made her ready for that? Surely you remember being a teenager? It wasn’t that long ago… even I remember and I’m a good deal older than you… Do you remember the first time you got hard?”
“I guess.. Yes I suppose I do” he nodded.
“Did it make you ready?”
“I guess not” he agreed shaking his head, remembering the uncomfortableness and awkwardness of it all. Feeling grown up and yet ashamed and the lack of control of it he had over his own body.
“And if on that day, I’d have come… and slipped my hands down your pants. Would you have enjoyed it?”
“No I don’t suppose I would; I guess I would have been mortified”
“Exactly, she was ready only to consider the idea of sex.. No not even that. She was only old enough to consider, considering the idea of it. Then you rushed her… pushed her too hard to fast and now she’s ruined”
“What can I do?” he pleaded.
“Nothing” she snapped. “Don’t you understand… you’ve killed it, you’ve royally buggered up any chances of that girl having any sort of desire for you?”
“Surely there is something?”
Arabella sighed, “Chris….i don’t know how to explain it any other way. There is no spark. She was too young to have one when you first took her. Continuing to repeating an act she now sees as a chore is unlikely to ignite one. If I where you … I’d settle getting your satisfaction elsewhere”
“With you?” he scoffed.
“I don’t honestly care” she reasoned. “Look I’m sure Maegan will be a fine wife, she’ll provide you with many pink cheeked babies but the fact is you broke her and the responsibility for that lies souly with you”